The Wrong Way to Deal With Grief by Chloe Caldi

Grief is an emotion that is similar to the feeling of clouds covering a grassy field, constantly pressing onto the ground, suffocating it. It feels that way until the clouds slowly start to clear, and bit by bit it becomes more bearable. I have lost almost all of my grandparents, multiple pets, cousins, and a friend. There is nothing more crushing. However, I still consider myself lucky. I know that there are those who have suffered worse loss, and more devastating yet, those who have never been loved the way I knew I was by the people I have lost.

The absolute worse way to handle the grief of a friend or loved one is to ignore it. Yesterday my dog of 10 years died suddenly. I went to school today and experienced many different reactions. Some of my best friends and family were amazing, and completely there for me. Some pretended like nothing happened. I was very, very upset, and in a place I expected to feel safe and loved, I felt alone at times. For everyone that hugged me or spoke to me with a feeling of care and empathy, there were people who looked the other way when coming in contact with my overly swollen face. I understand that not everyone handles things the same way, and a lot of teenagers don't know what to say. It's a very hard thing to deal with. But say something. Make an effort. I would never be upset with someone who brought up what had happened, because it did happen. I'm not going to forget about it. I won't "not think about it" because it is ignored. I know that humans have the best intentions at heart. I just can't see them if you refuse to make eye contact with me. Please just try. Anything is better than nothing.

I am writing this for the people who don't have the as much support as I had. I am very blessed to have an incredibly kind family and thoughtful friends, but not everyone is as lucky. If you see someone walking down the hallway, or in class that is clearly upset, do something. It doesn't have to be a grand gesture. You don't have to make a scene. Sometimes a smile is enough.

To everyone that shared a kind word or a tight embrace, I appreciate you and love you. Thank you for trying  to make me feel better, and for showing that you care. I hope that others will learn to do the same.